Hagrid's Adventures in Parenting
by Equinox73099
Summary: Whilst mourning another year he was denied the post of COMC Professor, Hagrid drunkenly decides to bring a birthday gift to six year old Harry Potter, only to find that his conditions at home are not ideal.


Hagrid's Adventures in Parenting

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

AN: Random Idea I had while writing for a different story I haven't posted the first chapter of yet. Would also like to point out I have 15k words written for the second chapter of Harry Potter and the Fresh Start on two different files cause I can't write a version of it I actually like enough to post. Possibly oneshot, might do more at a later date, hope y'all enjoy R&R pls.

"_I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's love and protection._" **-Sigmund Freud**

(note some text from the book at the start, Italicized)

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"_Could I-Could I say goodbye to him, sir?" Hagrid asked._

_ He bent his great, shaggy head over Harry and gave him what must have been a very scratchy, whiskery kiss. Then, suddenly, Hagrid let out a howl like a wounded dog._

_ "Shhh!" hissed Professor McGonagall. "You'll wake the muggles!"_

_ "S-s-sorry," sobbed Hagrid, taking out a large spotted Handkerchief and burying his face in it. "But I c-c-can't stand it- Lily and James dead- an' poor little Harry off ter live with muggles-"_

_ "Yes, yes, it's all very sad, but get a grip on yourself Hagrid, or we'll be found," Professor McGonagall whispered, patting Hagrid gingerly on the arm as Dumbledore stepped over the low garden wall and walked to the front door. He laid Harry gently on the doorstep, took a letter out of his cloak, tucked it inside Harry's blankets and then came back to the other two. _

_For a full minute the three of them stood and looked at the little bundle; Hagrid's shoulders shook, Professor McGonagall blinked furiously and the twinkling light that usually shone from Dumbledore's eyes seemed to have gone out. 'Well,' said Dumbledore finally, 'that's that. We've no business staying here. We may as well go and join the celebrations.' 'Yeah,' said Hagrid in a very muffled voice. 'I'd best get this bike away. G'night, Professor McGonagall – Professor Dumbledore, sir.' Wiping his streaming eyes on his jacket sleeve, Hagrid swung himself on to the motorbike and kicked the engine into life; with a roar it rose into the air and off into the night. _

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_Five Years Later, July 31st, 1986_

Inside The Three Broomsticks, at a table covered in empty mugs, Rubeus Hagrid, Groundskeeper at Hogwarts and Keeper of the Keys found himself deep in his cups, mourning another year where he was denied the post of Care of Magical Creatures Professor because the current instructor, Professor Kettleburn chose to extend his retirement date into the further future.

This was not the first time he had done this, Silvanus had done the same thing in 1984 and signed another two year contract, the same one he renewed this year as a matter of fact. Hagrid held a good amount of respect for the man because he was very well learned in the subject and he also had a fascination for magical creatures, the same as Hagrid. They had even shared many a conversation in this very pub about everything from flobberworms to chinese fireballs.

The man **knew** the Headmaster was waiting for Silvanus to retire to give Hagrid the job, knew that Hagrid had been yearning for the position for years, yet he still chose to keep teaching irrespective of Hagrid's wants or wishes.

Hagrid sighed and drained his mug again, watching as the enchantment on it made it refill automatically, Rosmerta had given this to him after he'd dirtied his 15th tankard, saying she was running out of glasses for other customers.

At this point Hagrid knew he was sloshed, completely piss drunk, but he couldn't bring himself to care much aside from the fact he'd have to get Poppy to make one of those extra strength hangover cures for him tomorrow.

He let his thoughts drift for awhile, going over this and that in his alcohol addled mind, before he began thinking about the date. July 31st, Harry Potter's birthday. Hagrid knew the little tyke would have turned 6 today. He lifted his glass in a toast to the boy and chugged its contents once again.

'I wonder jus' how little Harry's gettin' on after so long?' Hagrid thought. 'I'm sure he's 'appy, Dumbledore woulda done somethin' if he wasn't, but I wonder how he's doing? Does he look like James, like those blasted books say, or does he 'ave some Lily shinin' through? I wonder which one he takes after, I'd bet ten galleons he's smart as Lily and more mischievous than James could hope ter be.' he chuckled to himself at the thought of it. 'But even if he's not, I'm sure they'd of loved him jus' the same. Maybe...maybe I could sneak over there ter take a peek? I could even bring him a present! I know just the thing, I still have tha' scrapbook I was going ter give him when he started Hogwarts. What's the harm in lettin' him have it a little soon.'

Sober Hagrid would have remembered that Dumbledore stressed the fact that Harry should be left in peace by the magical world until he was sent his letter, at the very least. But drunk Hagrid absolutely knew that the Headmaster would agree that the lad should be allowed some photographs of his parents at the very least, drunk Hagrid was willing to bet Dumbledore would even side-along him over if he asked, but he didn't want to bother the Headmaster with this when he could just ride his bike over to the lad's house and give it to him.

He shambled back to Hogwarts, and to the shed near the edge of the Forbidden Forest that contained the bike gifted to him by Sirius Black. Hagrid had gone over that day a dozen times or more since then, but he still couldn't figure out why Black had given him Harry and a way to leave the area without a fight. It baffled him in all honesty, but Dumbledore's explanation that maybe he figured he could have tracked Harry down later after he killed Pettigrew made sense enough he supposed. The bike dipped under his weight, but started with a roar, as reliable as the day he got it.

He activated the flight and disillusionment enchantments before taking off, the roar of the engine softening to a purr as the wind took its place. Hagrid's eyes were protected from the wind by his goggles, but his hair was flapping about crazily in the breeze, making Hagrid wince at the nest his hair was going to be after he was done tonight, even more so than usual at least. The cold night air was helping Hagrid sober up, and sober Hagrid began making an appearance as He neared London.

Hagrid was starting to worry over his decision to do this, wondering if he should just turn around and head back, but a little voice in head, possibly drunk Hagrid, was telling him to keep going, that the boy probably had few, if any pictures of both his parents from living with the muggles, and he deserved that at least for all he'd lost. By the time he landed at the edge of Privet Drive in Surrey, it was nearing midnight and sober Hagrid had asserted complete dominance over drunk Hagrid, yet still urging him to finish his little quest to get Harry a birthday present.

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__Harry Potter was sound asleep in his cupboard, or his bedroom if the Dursleys were to be believed, when he was startled awake by an almighty bang sounding off from the front door. Harry stayed in his cupboard, too frightened to leave as he knew Uncle Vernon wouldn't be Happy being woken up during the night, nor would Aunt Petunia or Dudley for that matter.

The bang sounded once again, and Harry swore he heard the door rattling on its hinges. He knew from sneaking peeks at the telly while he was supposed to be cleaning the sitting room that the police knocked very loudly when they went to people's doors, but this knock put anything he'd heard before to shame. It sounded like someone was kicking their door with all they had, and judging by the door rattling, that might be the case.

A third knock sounded, this one being the final hammer strike that knocked the door flat on the floor, making Harry squeak and curl up in the corner of the cupboard, trying to hide himself from view. He heard a gruff voice muttering to himself. "Clumsy, strong-armed fool… Sorry about that!" he called out to what Harry thought was the empty room.

"Who the bloody hell are you?!" Uncle Vernon shouted from the top of the stairs, proving Harry wrong that it was to no one the man was speaking.

The man replied, "Rubeus Hagrid, Groundsman and Keeper of Keys at Hogwarts. Sorry for comin' at such a late hour, but I wanted to give young Harry a birthday present. Is tha' him there? Little bit o' extra meat on your bones there, Harry, but I can assure you that ain't nothin' ter be ashamed of."

"Our son is not that...that freak!" Aunt Petunia shouted at Hagrid.

"Leave our house at once, or we'll call the police." Vernon demanded, cocking the shotgun Harry knew he kept in their bedroom closet.

"Dry up Dursley yeh great prune," Harry heard the sound of metal groaning and wondered what was happening. "If tha' isn't Harry, then where is the lad?" Hagrid questioned.

Harry knew that if he left the cupboard, Uncle Vernon would get angry again, but Harry was so curious he couldn't stop himself from bursting out and mumbling, "I-I'm Harry Potter, sir…"

"O' course yeh are, Harry. Look really similar ter yer da' yeh do. But you've got yer mother's eyes clear as day." his voice sounded choked up with emotion.

"You knew my parents?" Harry breathed out.

"Of course I did, me an' Lily an' James were friends, see we were all a part of this group called… you know what, tha' isn't too important. But Harry, what were yeh doing in that cupboard?"

"That's my room…" Harry said hesitantly, ashamedly.

Besides the whimpering of his aunt, uncle, and cousin upstairs, silence reigned in the house for the better part of a minute while Hagrid digested that statement, his face grower redder as he kept hearing Harry say that over and over again in his head. "**What…**" he growled out, frightening Harry.

"I-I said that's my room, sir! I'm Sorry! I'll just go back, you don't have to give me anything, I know you said you came here to do it but I don't really-"

"Dursley… Explain. **Now!**" Hagrid shouted out, causing Harry to freeze for a moment while he processed that Hagrid wasn't actually angry at him.

"Y-y-you lot drop the freak off with us without so much as a by your leave, just leaving the boy here with no more than a blanket and a note! You didn't ask us if we wanted him, if we wanted his… freakishness in our home!" he spat. "We had no say in any of it! We might have had to take him in, but that didn't mean we had to treat him as though he was anything more than the freak he is!"

Hagrid's hands were clenching and unclenching, a sign Harry knew well enough from Uncle Vernon that meant he was absolutely furious and trying hard to reign in his temper, not that Vernon ever did when Harry was on the receiving end of his ire.

"Harry," Hagrid spoke after visible calming down. "Did these… people do anything else ter you?" he asked kindly.

Harry went to speak, but Vernon cut him off, "Don't tell that monster anything, freak! Don't tell him a damn thing."

Hagrid shot a dark look up the stairs and turned back to Harry, crouching down with a grunt and smiling kindly. "Harry, I promise yeh, I won't let them do **anything** else to you, no matter what. Please, tell me what they've done to yeh."

"They… hurt me. Like, hit me and stuff," he mumbled. "Aunt Petunia sometimes hits me with a frying pan when I'm late to cook, o-or when something doesn't taste as good as she wants. Uncle Vernon likes to hit me a lot… but only because he gets angry a lot for some reason!" Harry's attempts to defend these monsters only broke Hagrid's heart a little bit more. "Dudley and his friends like to chase me around a lot too… they call it Harry Hunting, but I don't like that game." he finished with a frown.

Hagrid was furiously thinking about what to do. What he wanted to do, kill the Dursleys with his bare hands and hide the bodies, he was sure Dumbledore wouldn't approve of, but things couldn't be allowed to stand as they were. Finally, he came up with at least a temporary solution.

"Do yeh have a coat, Harry?" he asked.

"N-no." he said shyly.

"That's alright, I'll let yeh use mine, though it's probably a bit too big for yeh." he chuckled.

"Why would I need to use your coat, Sir?" Harry asked.

"Cause I'm gonna take yeh with me, back ter Hogwarts to talk to someone. They'll be able ter help yeh more than me."

"Ok…" he said as Hagrid bundled him up in the jacket, more so wrapping it around him and turning him into a furry burrito with his head sticking out than actually putting the coat on him. Hagrid lifted him up and carried him outside, glaring one last time at the Dursleys as he left. Walking out the door, though, Hagrid decided to be vengeful and stomped extra hard on the fallen door, breaking it into small pieces as he stepped out.

He deposited Harry into the motorbike's sidecar, activating the sticking charm on the seat to ensure he wouldn't fall out. "I'm telling yeh, Harry, you'll love seein' Hogwarts," he stated as he kickstarted the bike. "Greatest place in the world, it is."

"What is it?" Harry asked.

"It's a school Harry, the best school ter learn magic in the world." he said proudly over the roar of the engine.

"A school for magic?" Harry's nose crinkled.

"But O' course. Where do you think yer Mum and Dad learned it all? Actually, maybe you didn't know about considering those… Harry, what do you know about yer folks?" he instead asked.

"My aunt and uncle told me they were drunk driving and died in a car crash."

"A CAR CRASH?! A CAR CRASH, KILLING LILY AND JAMES POTTER!" he roared, his desire to go Dursley hunting renewed with a vengeance.

It took him a moment to calm down, then he said "Harry, yer folks were two o' the greatest people I knew. I promise yeh, they were not drunks!" he stated forcefully. "And they weren't killed in a car crash either, but that's a story for another time." he got the bike picking up speed down the road, before he activated the invisibility and flight enchantments, startling Harry as they took to the skies.

Harry was amazed as he saw Privet Drive, and Surrey, shrinking below them, and began to believe what Hagrid was saying about magic for the first time. He gazed, awed at the sights below him even though the city had long since been replaced by dark forests hidden by the cloudy night. Eventually even the trees gave way to highland grazing plains, and Hagrid knew they would soon be back at Hogwarts.

They landed with a few bumps, but came out of it alright. Hagrid noticed Harry had fallen asleep along the way, just like he did when Hagrid brought him to that horrible place, he noted with no small amount of sadness. He picked the lad up gently so as to not wake him, and began carrying him towards the school, and subsequently the Headmaster's office. He knew that Dumbledore would be asleep at this time of night, but Hagrid also knew his quarters had a hallway connecting it to his office.

He made his way up hoping that he didn't run into any Professors that would ask him what was going on before he could explain to Dumbledore. His luck held true, and he made it to the Gargoyle, muttering out "Sugar Quill." and waiting while it slid aside to reveal the entrance to the Headmaster's office.

Hagrid jumped when he got inside the room, as Dumbledore was sitting behind his desk, looking at Hagrid with a stern expression.

"Hagrid, I truly hope you have a good reason for defying my wishes and forcing Harry out from the safety of the wards around his home."

"Wards?" Hagrid questioned, but then his mind caught up with the rest of the question/demand. "Yes sir! Those… things- I'd call 'em animals but they'd make a Horntail look like a household pet- have abused Harry greatly sir! I heard from the lad himself what they've done to 'im, along with how they treated him while I was there to begin with. Not to mention the fact that he was sleeping in a bloody storage cupboard I don't think you could fit in Headmaster!" Albus cast a sleeping spell in Harry's directions so he would sleep through their conversation, before turning to regard Hagrid seriously.

"Are you sure about this, Hagrid?" he asked.

"I'll swear on my magic that everything I've said is true, sir." he waved his umbrella around for extra emphasis.

"...how about you allow me to withdraw your memory of this evening instead, Hagrid. I wish to view this for myself. But before I do, what were you doing at Privet Drive when I stated that Harry should be left alone by the magical world until he turned eleven."

"Truthfully sir, I'd been in me cups at the Three Broomsticks, when it occurred to me that it was the lad's birthday. In my… drunken state, I thought the lad might want a scrapbook with some photos o' his parents I had ready for when he came to Hogwarts. I decided to take it to him, and tha' led to this." Hagrid explained nervously.

Albus sighed, "I can't say I approve of this, but if what you've told me is true, then it will have worked out for the better I suppose. Now then, if you would bend down slightly and recall this evening, I shall withdraw the memory so I can view it." Hagrid did so, and Dumbledore pulled a silvery strand from his temple, dropping into the pensieve sat by the wall.

When he emerged fifteen minutes later, Dumbledore was significantly paler, and practically dropped into his seat, putting his head into his hands and groaning. "How was I not made aware of this… I shall need to have words with Arabella about this…"

"What're we goin' to do, Headmaster?" Hagrid asked worriedly.

"I-I don't know as of yet. While he is there, he is under their protection, double edged blade though it is," he frowned heavily. "Whereas here, the ministry and just about every magical family under the sun would be vying for custody of The-Boy-Who-Lived. I cannot in good conscience send him back there, but nor can he reside in the magical world until someone trustworthy already has custody of the boy or he is declared of age. There, he is protected from those who would wish him harm by the blood wards I erected, and he is protected from ministerial interference by his blood having custody over him. Should they relinquish that custody, or the ministry realizes they do not want it, it will become a disaster very quickly."

"There has to be somethin' we can do for him!" Hagrid pleaded. "Lily and James would not want this for their boy, you know tha' just as well as I do! We owe it to em' as their friends to help Harry!"

"I agree Hagrid, I do. I simply need some time to think about how to best go about this." Albus soothed Hagrid's worries.

They sat there in silence for what felt like hours, both trying to think of some way to help. It was Hagrid who had a stroke of genius strike first, surprising Albus out of his musings by saying, "Headmaster, sir, I think I've got an idea."

"What is it my boy?" Albus asked curiously.

"You say he needs to stay at that house with his relatives to be safe from everyone else right?" Hagrid pressed.

"It would be ideal, yes."

"Why don't we have someone move in with him. Someone ter make sure he's treated right by 'em."

"That… is a good idea Hagrid," Hagrid was too happy at finding a possible solution to take offense at Dumbledore's surprise. "But who would we allow to stay… most everyone I would trust with the job have other duties they must attend too. Maybe Remus… but he would have to leave for at least three days each month, not to mention I would have to track him down first. Elphias is busy writing his memoirs and wouldn't wish to do it…"

After a few minutes of Dumbledore mentioning people only to then state why they wouldn't do it, Hagrid blurted out. "I'll do it, Headmaster!"

"You will?"

"O' course I will. It was me that took him to that place ter begin with. It's only right I make sure he's happy there."

"But… what of your jobs as groundskeeper? Keeper of Keys?"

"I suppose you'll just have ter replace me until Harry comes to Hogwarts, sir. Even then, I'd only be here while Harry's here."

"...This is a great deal of responsibility, Hagrid, are you sure this is the path you wish to take?"

Hagrid only straightened up, before stating, "I'll take care of 'im like he was my own, Headmaster. Not that I'll avoid telling the lad about Lily and James. Harry deserves to know his parents."

Albus smiled. "Very well Hagrid, I shall allow you to temporarily resign from your posts, though I will expect you back when the time comes, you are far too valuable to let go that easily my boy. I shall trust Harry to your care, should you need to contact me I will have an Owl stationed with Arabella you can use after I speak with her, or in an emergency I'm sure you could use your bike."

"Uhh, Headmaster… you might need to come with me to help me expand a room for me an' Harry to sleep in. I'll also need ter move my things outta my house. D'ya think I should take Fang with me? He's only a pup right now, but he'll get big as a wolf once he's grown."

"Probably not… I shall tell Professor Kettleburn to watch after fang and your house until such a time as you can return."

"Thank yeh, Headmaster." the conversation tapered off, and both looked to the boy who they had failed so badly.

"I think it is about time to wake our young friend and explain what is going to happen." Dumbledore stated, lifting his wand and removing the sleep spell.

The boy woke gradually, shifting in the fur cloak, letting out a great yawn and sitting up. He looked around and noticed that he wasn't at Privet Drive and began to look alarmed, but calmed down once he remembered what happened. He looked at Hagrid and smiled. "Is this Hogwarts, Mister Hagrid?" he asked.

"It is." Hagrid beamed. "This here is who I wanted yeh ter talk to. This is Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry." he emphasized by making hand gestures in Albus' direction.

"Hello Harry, how are you?" Dumbledore asked gently.

"I-I'm fine, sir." he replied shyly.

"I am happy to hear that. Now Harry, Mister Hagrid has informed me about the circumstances that led to your arrival here and asked that I help you. He has made a convincing case, and even offered a solution that I wish to try. Do you want to hear it?" he kept his voice soft and encouraging, trying to stop Harry from withdrawing into himself.

"Yes sir! I-If you don't mind, that is…"

"I don't mind at all. For your own safety, I am afraid you shall have to stay with your blood relatives," Harry looked absolutely crushed in that one moment. "But things cannot be allowed to stand as they are. Hagrid has asked that he be allowed to move in with you, and make sure the Dursleys treat you as they should. I shall be going as well when you return to prepare a room in their abode for the two of you, but then I will have to return to my duties here and prepare for the school year."

"You're really coming to stay with me, Mister Hagrid?" he asked hopefully.

"O' course I am! I'm not about to let 'em treat you like that 'arry. I'll set 'em straight if they try it…" Hagrid almost hoped they would, he wanted to vent some frustration on the Dursleys.

"Awesome! We'll be roommates! We can play together and do loads of other things…" he babbled on and on, showing Hagrid a taste of what was in his future. As daunting as it seemed, Hagrid couldn't stop a smile from forming at the young lad's antics, as it was a vast improvement from when they met earlier tonight. He didn't know whether or not he would be able to help Harry as well as someone more qualified, but he'd damn sure give it his best, for Harry, and James and Lily.

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